Life tends to present us with circumstances which victimize each of us at times. Some of these events we can control and some of them are completely out of our control. The thing I want you to know is that there is a difference in being victimized and being a victim.
Being victimized calls us to a particular moment in time, it is an event or group of events that we traumatic. Being a victim is a state of mind. Victims tend to become induced due to their victimization. This causes them to become cynical, non-trusting, often depressed, mean-spirited, argumentative, complainers, negative and even suicidal. Some people are very comfortable in being the victim.This can be controlled.
Victims tend to use phrases like: “This happened because of…” or “if you hadn’t don’t this, then I could have done….” Being victimized is an unfortunate part of life (obviously some of these events are more traumatic then others) but we have to be able to move forward. People that have made great impacts in history have had to push beyond traumatic experiences in order to accomplish greatness.
I didn’t write this blog to condemn anyone and make the situation worse. I wrote it to bring clarity to chaos and to help some people. If you aren’t sure if you are a victim (not able to truly move forward) ask two or three people that know you very well and can be brutally honest with you. Here are the questions you should ask them:
Do I often appear depressed?
Do I consistently blame people or organizations for things?
Do I complain a lot?
If you 2 or 3 of the answers to those questions is “yes”, then you are a victim or appear to be one.
There is help. I suggest counseling (I used to think that something was wrong with you when you needed counseling, totally not true!). You should speak with a professional who can walk through the tangled web of victimization(s) to get you to a place of full recovery.
Remember if you make the right decision(s) your life can change positively in mere moments.